Dear Blog,

I'm sorry that I have broken my promise to you - again.

I know it was only a couple posts ago that I vowed not to leave you forlorn.
But here I am, backlogged with pictures and updates while I stare blank at the screen, not knowing where to begin.

I know there is no excuse. But with visitors, a traveling spouse, a job to do, and two abnormally energetic children (you may think all kids are energetic but I beg to differ - wait till you hang out with mine!), it's T-U-F-F.

I know I have a problem with setting my priorities (obviously coz you are always at the bottom of my list although you deserve much better treatment), but after a non-stop 15+ hours day, most of the time my priority by 9 at night is to hit the hay.

That would be ideal, except that I never got to go to bed at 9pm. Usually after the kids are down at 7:30, I spend the first 30 minutes being overwhelmed by the idea of having free time. It's very disorienting (especially when one is too used to being deprived of it) and all I could manage are mindless activites like checking my facebook or reading articles/newsletter that I subscribed on the internet. Sometimes I beat myself up for wasting time, and sometimes I got to read meaningful things and get energized. It's really a mixed bag and you never know.

After vegging out, if Mr. Cobbett is around, we usually head out for a walk for another round of decompressing and bonding. Well, that's a lot of decompressing going on, you may say, but not to belabor the point, parenting is a demanding job (though I would do it any day for my two little (energetic) angels). There are days,no weeks, that I go on autopilot and plough through the days like a combine. Regular decompression is a way to survival.

When 9pm rolls around, which would have been my ideal bed time, reality kicks in and it's tying-up-the-loose-ends-of-the-day time. Lesson planning, menu planning, homework grading, correspondence follow-up (read: emails, SMS-es, returning phone calls etc.),chores...the next time I look at the clock it would have been midnight.

Then I think of you, and I also think of all my other very discplined blogging friends, who manage to churn out a post regularly with kids and all, and I feel

disappointed,
guilty,
TIRED.

There I understand I have a choice to make: to visit you faithfully, or, this time really, to hit the hay. And then I saw the fifteen books accumulated next to my bedside table that I have yet to finish, at least one of them. The verdict is clear, read and hit the hay.

Sorry for being long-winded. And sorry that this letter sounds more like a complaint than an apology. I'm rambling, and yeah, I'm not even sure if I make sense. But I guess by now you would know why I write the way I do. (wink wink)

Thank you for listening as you always do. I will make no promises lest I once again disappoint.
All I can say is, Hope to see you soon!

Your very contrite friend,
C.C.